~John Irving, A Prayer For Owen Meany
And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made
it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the
storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm,
you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.
~Haruki Murakami, Kafka On the Shore"It's darkest before the dawn." "This too shall pass." "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." "Time heals all wounds." Most of us have had faced adversity, in one or the other of its many forms - job burnout, surviving cancer, mending a broken heart, loss of a pet, becoming a widow/er, coping with chronic illness - and most of us have heard a lot of platitudes as we try to muddle through the aftermath. Seems like a lot of folks think you should just be getting on with your life, but that's easier said than done. Instead, Buddhist scholar Pema Chödrön suggests:
We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don't really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It's just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.
It can be difficult to buck the expectations of others, or even yourself, and take your time to cope with whatever life has dished out on your plate. Here's a list of books that w hope might help you along your journey. You can find more books on this topic using a subject search of "Adjustment (Psychology)." Is there a book that has helped you through a crisis? Let us know in the comments.
When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice For Difficult Times by Pema Chödrön [eBook]
Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life by Susan David, PhD
Out of the Woods: A Memoir of Wayfinding by Lynn Darling
Addict in the house: a no-nonsense family guide through addiction & recovery by Robin Barnett, EdD, LCSW
Ten Years Later: Six People Who Faced Adversity and Transformed Their Lives bu Hoda Kotb with Jane Lorenzini
The Ten Things To Do When Your Life Falls Apart: An Emotional and Spiritual Handbook by Daphne Rose Kingma
How to Cope: The Welcoming Approach to Life's Challenges by Dr. Claire Hayes
AfterShock: What To Do When the Doctor Gives You, or Someone You Love, A Devastating Diagnosis by Jessie Gruman [eBook]
A Widow's Guide to Healing: Gentle Support and Advice For the First 5 Years by Kristin Meekhof, James Windell
Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard by Chip Heath and Dan Heath
The Secrets of Lost Cats: One Woman, Twenty Posters, and a New Understanding of Love by Dr. Nancy Davidson
The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully by Frank Ostaseski
The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully by Frank Ostaseski
